Heart of Stone – Written in Court at Abingdon Assizes 1823

Abingdon Assizes
To treat thus a Maiden’s a shame and disgrace;
‘Twas vile to desert her – unfeeling and base;
Yet, what but such conduct could any one hope;
(Not forgiven, I’m sure, would it be by the Pope)
From one, who by evidence clear it is shown,
Was really possessed of THE HEART OF A STONE.

Written in Court at Abingdon Assizes (Abingdon County Hall Sessions Hall) circa 1823, during the trial of a breach of promise of marriage.

Thursday 8 October 2015 is National Poetry Day. The day is a chance to break with the tyranny of prose by sharing poetry with the hashtag #nationalpoetryday.

16 thoughts on “Heart of Stone – Written in Court at Abingdon Assizes 1823

  1. ppjs

    Well, today I’m in Rome
    and far from my home,
    but I’m sure to return
    you’ll be happy to learn.
    This blog means so much
    as it keeps me in touch
    with opinions and views
    of my town’s local news.
    To each and to all –
    but mostly Backstreeter –
    this ode comes from Paul
    as an opening greeter.

    Reply
  2. davidofLuton

    When I left Oxfordshire
    I knew I’d require
    To stay in touch
    Nothing so much
    as a blog that’s online
    So if I should pine
    For a pint at the Kings head
    I could read this instead.

    Reply
  3. Iain

    A poetic blogger, backstreeter
    Experimented with both rhyme and meter
    And although his verse
    Could have be worse
    His blog was the clear world-beater

    Reply
  4. Captainkaos2

    She stood on the bridge at midnight
    Her belly all a quiver
    She gave a cough
    Her leg fell off
    And floated down the river ‘

    Reply
  5. Captainkaos2

    The problem was our poor guild hall
    Not fit for a theatre or even a balll
    Let’s call in consultants
    There’s plenty at hand
    Then we can waste 100 grand.

    Half a cinema would certainly fail
    Hold up ! How about a car boot sale?
    The doors have closed, the lights not on
    Where Has that wonderful tapestry gone?

    Now that 60’s building of Portland stone
    Stands empty and cold.
    And a tad forlorn
    Even The mayors Christmas party
    Will need a new home.

    Reply
  6. backstreeter

    The Guildhall changed ownership
    Not so long ago
    The district wanted rid of it
    The town could make a go

    A Cinema or Cinemas
    Was the first rallying call
    They brought in some consultants
    to transform the old Guildhall

    The costs began to spiral
    And grants did not come in
    A new council were elected
    old schemes went in bin

    Sober heads decided
    to make a simpler plan
    and not risk on a venture
    that could go down the pan…..

    Reply
  7. Captainkaos2

    Oh no!
    Ay up everyone
    Info overload
    They’re starting to build at
    65 Oxford road,

    A digger, a dumper,
    A site hut too
    They’ve even installed
    A blue port-a-loo

    The planners are there
    All scratching their heads
    Where’s the trees, the shrubs
    And the established beds?

    Ought to finish the gaol
    Before they build there
    And What will they build
    Does anyone care?

    A huge block of flats
    Na, that wouldn’t look right
    A hotel? a garage?
    It’s a pretty big site

    I know, I’ve got it,
    A new guild hall
    A gift from the builder
    In return for the gaol!

    Reply
  8. Iain

    No cinema and theatre in our town of Abingdon
    Sadly the opportunity has now been and gone
    The plans were realistic and not that controversial
    The newly elected council are simply not commercial

    They say that borrorwing money represents cash lost
    Whilst ignoring the net impact on the running cost
    New plans will add no revenue unfortunately I fear
    And we will keep on paying one fifty grand a year

    A million pounds will achieve a charming ‘village hall’
    Ideal for masonic meetings and a lovely mayor’s ball
    But for our younger people there’s nothing they will want
    So well done town council – a shiny white elephant

    (Sorry about tenuous last rhyme)

    Reply
  9. ppjs

    Tenuous, Ian? It’s a flaming disgrace;
    stand at the back and cover your face!
    I’ve just been across to Rome’s Colosseum –
    it’s a little bit bigger than our town museum.
    Meanwhile at St Paul’s that’s “outside the walls”
    I’ve got a small room in the abbey’s grand halls.
    The Tiber’s all right; my nostalgia stems
    from fact that right now I can’t walk by the Thames.
    ====
    I’ve had just enough
    of this rhyming stuff!
    Good evening all
    from your friend Paul.

    Reply
  10. davidofLuton

    So long as it’s ideal for masons’ meetings then we can say “Job done”
    it would not do to encourage the riff-raff into town for too much fun.

    Reply
  11. ppjs

    And now I am near
    to Castelgandolfo,
    and whatever you hear
    I’m not playing golf. No
    that wouldn’t be right
    and might give Pope Francis
    a terrible fright
    or draw killing glances
    from Swiss Army guards
    who demand more respect
    or they’ll show you your cards.

    Shall I continue? I’d better relent,
    or else I’ll find I’m forced to repent.

    ====

    Why am I doing this?
    I really can’t tell.
    If it goes on my longer
    I’ll end up in…
    … HULL.

    Reply
  12. ppjs

    sorry, “much” longer!

    Italy is obviously eroding any sense I might have earlier laid claim to. Note: this is not a poem.

    Reply
  13. Captainkaos2

    Ah ppjs-
    you’re on holiday I guess
    In the papel city?
    The pantheon is so pretty

    No doubt to see the pope?
    The guy that gives us hope
    I’ve seen him on a Sunday morning
    Been witness to his warnings

    His teaching and preaching
    Are a joy to behold
    About a never ending story
    Or so we are told

    Are you there to meet him?
    Or escape from this cold
    Or chasing a whim
    The De Vinci code?

    Quest the Knights Templar
    Galahad, Tristram and kin
    The bold table who fought Saladin

    And what of the fable
    This story, nay tale
    Is there really such
    As the Holy Grail?

    I suppose it comes down to faith within
    As to whether you fear the devil and sin
    It matters not to everyone else
    As long as you can be true to yourself !

    Reply
  14. Daniel

    OK, I’m sorry I’m late,
    I guess I’ve taken the bait
    …perhaps it was fate
    An itch to satiate?
    But I just couldn’t wait
    And after a spate
    Of rhymes first rate
    I’d rather placate
    Instead of berate
    An unusual trait
    But I’ll just say it straight…

    Wait

    Wait

    The flowers look great!

    Reply
  15. Hester

    Oh dear I feel inadequate
    Because a poem I have not writ
    And for a topic I despair
    Ah – here’s a plug for the Craft Fair

    Abbey Buildings Thurs- Sat this week and next.

    Reply
  16. ppjs

    St Benedict’s footsteps I have come here to trace,
    and Monte Cassino will be a sure place,
    but first in the catacombs and Lateran John
    I begin with some friends my pilgrimage on.
    Our leader has given us each a timetable
    with Italian names that I am not able
    to find rhyming words for in my native tongue
    so here’s where the last of my song will be sung.
    On lake Alban’s quiet hillside at old Palazzola
    I sit with ristretto – not for me rum and cola –
    but under the sun and a deep azure sky
    the news on this blog will gladden my eye.

    ====

    No, no – enough, I really must stop
    or you, my good friends, will throw a great strop.
    Addio,a prossimo tempo, and ciao;
    it really must be farewell for now.

    Reply

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